prince-problems
Original: prince-problems on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Servant: M'lord! ...why do you wear a mask?
Panel 2:
Prince: Look, I'm a prince, okay? You never know what's cursed to await a prince's kiss.
Panel 3:
Prince: Suppose I accidentally touch lips with a bird and the bird is actually a transmogrified princess. Bam. Now I gotta marry a princess who spent who knows how long shitting in the woods and doinking canaries.
Panel 4:
Prince: Suppose I trip and fall at a funeral, accidentally kiss the corpse, now it's alive again and I gotta explain the whole thing was an accident and please madame would you go back to being dead!
Panel 5:
Prince: Not for me, man! This prince ain't marryin' no bird-lady or no corpse!
Panel 6:
Prince: Guess this'd be a bad time to bring up my toad-sister.
Servant: Lower-class AND amphibian?!
Votey:
Prince (frowning): We can fool around but the mask stays on.
Servant: M'lord! ...why do you wear a mask?
Panel 2:
Prince: Look, I'm a prince, okay? You never know what's cursed to await a prince's kiss.
Panel 3:
Prince: Suppose I accidentally touch lips with a bird and the bird is actually a transmogrified princess. Bam. Now I gotta marry a princess who spent who knows how long shitting in the woods and doinking canaries.
Panel 4:
Prince: Suppose I trip and fall at a funeral, accidentally kiss the corpse, now it's alive again and I gotta explain the whole thing was an accident and please madame would you go back to being dead!
Panel 5:
Prince: Not for me, man! This prince ain't marryin' no bird-lady or no corpse!
Panel 6:
Prince: Guess this'd be a bad time to bring up my toad-sister.
Servant: Lower-class AND amphibian?!
Votey:
Prince (frowning): We can fool around but the mask stays on.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic drawn in a medieval setting. A bearded prince in red robes wears a black face mask over his nose and mouth. A plainly-dressed servant asks why he wears a mask. The prince explains, gesturing dramatically, that as a prince he never knows what's cursed to await his kiss: he might accidentally kiss a bird that turns out to be a transmogrified princess and be forced to marry someone who spent ages 'shitting in the woods and doinking canaries,' or trip at a funeral, kiss a corpse, revive it, and have to awkwardly ask it to go back to being dead. He declares he won't marry any bird-lady or corpse. The servant then asks if this would be a bad time to mention his 'toad-sister,' and reacts in horror: 'Lower-class AND amphibian?!' The joke pivots from the prince's curse-avoidance paranoia to a snobby class-and-species prejudice. Votey (bonus panel): a close-up of the masked prince frowning, saying 'We can fool around but the mask stays on.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.