paw
Original: paw on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A man with red hair (the man) hands an object to a hooded figure with long hair.
Man: I GIVE YOU THE UNCREATIVE MONKEY'S PAW.
Hooded figure: UNCREATIVE?
Panel 2:
The hooded figure holds up a green monkey's paw.
Hooded figure: IT GRANTS 3 WISHES WITH EEEEEEVIL CONSEQUENCES, NONE OF WHICH ARE CLEVERLY IRONIC.
Panel 3:
The red-haired man, looking pleased.
Man: I WISH I WAS THE WORLD'S RICHEST MAN!
Panel 4:
Close-up of the green monkey's paw against a glowing red background as the wish takes effect.
Panel 5:
The red-haired man holds up his phone.
Man: NOW TO PULL UP MY BANK ACCOUNT, AND... WHAT'S THIS?
Panel 6:
Close-up of the man's face and his phone. The phone screen shows a news alert with a photo of the distressed red-haired man.
Phone headline: Breaking: Rich guy's dong falls off.
Votey:
The man's face, drawn in a simple sketch style, smiling.
Man: Worth it.
A man with red hair (the man) hands an object to a hooded figure with long hair.
Man: I GIVE YOU THE UNCREATIVE MONKEY'S PAW.
Hooded figure: UNCREATIVE?
Panel 2:
The hooded figure holds up a green monkey's paw.
Hooded figure: IT GRANTS 3 WISHES WITH EEEEEEVIL CONSEQUENCES, NONE OF WHICH ARE CLEVERLY IRONIC.
Panel 3:
The red-haired man, looking pleased.
Man: I WISH I WAS THE WORLD'S RICHEST MAN!
Panel 4:
Close-up of the green monkey's paw against a glowing red background as the wish takes effect.
Panel 5:
The red-haired man holds up his phone.
Man: NOW TO PULL UP MY BANK ACCOUNT, AND... WHAT'S THIS?
Panel 6:
Close-up of the man's face and his phone. The phone screen shows a news alert with a photo of the distressed red-haired man.
Phone headline: Breaking: Rich guy's dong falls off.
Votey:
The man's face, drawn in a simple sketch style, smiling.
Man: Worth it.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. Panel 1: a red-haired man hands an object to a long-haired hooded figure, saying "I give you the uncreative monkey's paw." The figure replies, "Uncreative?" Panel 2: the figure holds up a green monkey's paw and explains, "It grants 3 wishes with eeeeeevil consequences, none of which are cleverly ironic." Panel 3: the man happily declares, "I wish I was the world's richest man!" Panel 4: a close-up of the green paw against a glowing red background as the wish activates. Panel 5: the man holds his phone, saying, "Now to pull up my bank account, and... what's this?" Panel 6: a close-up of his phone showing a breaking-news alert with his own distressed photo and the headline "Breaking: Rich guy's dong falls off" — the unironic evil consequence is just bluntly cruel rather than clever. Votey: a simple sketch of the man's face smiling, saying "Worth it."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.