see-yourself
Original: see-yourself on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Interviewer (a man in a suit, seated): If you come work here, where do you see yourself in five years?
Panel 2:
Job candidate (a woman with dark hair, in a maroon vest and white shirt): Logically, I should consider all outcomes then project the average outcome of the space of possibilities.
Panel 3:
Candidate: So, five years from now I'm 2.3% dead, 24% pregnant, and with a 16% larger income adjusted for inflation.
Panel 4:
Candidate: I guess I see myself as an upwardly mobile, slightly zombified mother-to-be.
Panel 5 (the candidate, contemplative, and the interviewer in close-up):
(no dialogue)
Panel 6:
Interviewer: You're hired!
Votey:
Interviewer: Well, 63% hired.
Interviewer (a man in a suit, seated): If you come work here, where do you see yourself in five years?
Panel 2:
Job candidate (a woman with dark hair, in a maroon vest and white shirt): Logically, I should consider all outcomes then project the average outcome of the space of possibilities.
Panel 3:
Candidate: So, five years from now I'm 2.3% dead, 24% pregnant, and with a 16% larger income adjusted for inflation.
Panel 4:
Candidate: I guess I see myself as an upwardly mobile, slightly zombified mother-to-be.
Panel 5 (the candidate, contemplative, and the interviewer in close-up):
(no dialogue)
Panel 6:
Interviewer: You're hired!
Votey:
Interviewer: Well, 63% hired.
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic about a job interview. A male interviewer asks a female candidate (dark hair, maroon vest) where she sees herself in five years. She answers by reasoning statistically: she says she should consider all outcomes and project the average of the space of possibilities, concluding that in five years she'll be '2.3% dead, 24% pregnant, and with a 16% larger income adjusted for inflation.' She sums up that she sees herself as 'an upwardly mobile, slightly zombified mother-to-be.' After a thoughtful beat, the interviewer enthusiastically declares 'You're hired!' Votey panel: the interviewer adds, deadpan, 'Well, 63% hired.' — hiring her own probabilistic logic back at her.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.