pearls
Original: pearls on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (single panel):
A large bald man in profile on the right speaks to a clam/mollusk sitting in an open shell on a wooden post by the water.
Man: AND WHEN THE GREAT MASTER DIED... AMIDST HIS FUNERAL PYRE WE FOUND A NEAT PILE OF PERFECT WHITE PEARLS.
Mollusk (in the shell on the post): PEARLS? YOU MEAN THOSE HARD CYSTS I MAKE TO PROTECT MY BODY FROM PARASITES AND DIRT? YOU GUYS LIKE THOSE?
Caption (below panel): By and large, mollusks have not come around to Buddhism.
Votey:
Close-up of the open clam shell on the post.
Mollusk: ALSO, I'M REALLY INTO MONEY, SEX, AND POWER.
A large bald man in profile on the right speaks to a clam/mollusk sitting in an open shell on a wooden post by the water.
Man: AND WHEN THE GREAT MASTER DIED... AMIDST HIS FUNERAL PYRE WE FOUND A NEAT PILE OF PERFECT WHITE PEARLS.
Mollusk (in the shell on the post): PEARLS? YOU MEAN THOSE HARD CYSTS I MAKE TO PROTECT MY BODY FROM PARASITES AND DIRT? YOU GUYS LIKE THOSE?
Caption (below panel): By and large, mollusks have not come around to Buddhism.
Votey:
Close-up of the open clam shell on the post.
Mollusk: ALSO, I'M REALLY INTO MONEY, SEX, AND POWER.
Alt text
A bald man shown in profile tells a clam resting in an open shell atop a wooden post by the water: "And when the great master died... amidst his funeral pyre we found a neat pile of perfect white pearls." The clam replies, "Pearls? You mean those hard cysts I make to protect my body from parasites and dirt? You guys like those?" A caption beneath reads: "By and large, mollusks have not come around to Buddhism." In the votey aftercomic, a close-up of the open clam shell, the mollusk adds, "Also, I'm really into money, sex, and power." The joke contrasts the reverence humans attach to pearls (treated as relics of an enlightened master) with the mollusk's blunt, decidedly un-enlightened, materialistic self-description.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.