by-jove
Original: by-jove on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: An older man with grey hair and round glasses, standing at a podium.
Man: "Here's the idea. You have a spaceship fly though Jupiter's atmosphere, which contains both helium-3 and deuterium. You extract them, then use them to run a fusion drive that powers you to the nearest star at high velocity."
Panel 2: A woman with dark hair, looking incredulous.
Woman: "This is insane! No one can make ANY fusion drive work, and you're talking about one that's particularly hot and difficult!"
Panel 3: The woman continues, gesturing.
Woman: "Then you expect us to build it in space, hook it to a gigantic spaceship, dip it into the biggest planetary gravity well around, then zoom off to another star at a speed so high that a single pebble in our path will be equivalent to a direct hit by a nuclear missile!"
Panel 4: Close-up of the old man's face, looking unbothered.
Panel 5: The woman, still upset.
Panel 6: The old man raises a finger.
Man: "Ahem."
Panel 7: The old man speaks.
Man: "The proposal is called 'The Jupiter Scoopiter.'"
Panel 8: The woman, now won over, faces the old man.
Woman: "I will devote my life to it."
Votey: A speech bubble from off-panel.
Voice: "Could we make it less stupider?"
Below, a simple line drawing of a whale-like or blob creature.
Man: "Here's the idea. You have a spaceship fly though Jupiter's atmosphere, which contains both helium-3 and deuterium. You extract them, then use them to run a fusion drive that powers you to the nearest star at high velocity."
Panel 2: A woman with dark hair, looking incredulous.
Woman: "This is insane! No one can make ANY fusion drive work, and you're talking about one that's particularly hot and difficult!"
Panel 3: The woman continues, gesturing.
Woman: "Then you expect us to build it in space, hook it to a gigantic spaceship, dip it into the biggest planetary gravity well around, then zoom off to another star at a speed so high that a single pebble in our path will be equivalent to a direct hit by a nuclear missile!"
Panel 4: Close-up of the old man's face, looking unbothered.
Panel 5: The woman, still upset.
Panel 6: The old man raises a finger.
Man: "Ahem."
Panel 7: The old man speaks.
Man: "The proposal is called 'The Jupiter Scoopiter.'"
Panel 8: The woman, now won over, faces the old man.
Woman: "I will devote my life to it."
Votey: A speech bubble from off-panel.
Voice: "Could we make it less stupider?"
Below, a simple line drawing of a whale-like or blob creature.
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. An older man with round glasses at a podium pitches a wildly ambitious spaceship idea: fly through Jupiter's atmosphere to scoop helium-3 and deuterium, run a fusion drive, and rocket to the nearest star. A dark-haired woman erupts in disbelief, listing everything insane about the plan, ending that at such speed a single pebble would hit like a nuclear missile. The man calmly says 'Ahem' and announces the proposal is called 'The Jupiter Scoopiter.' Won over by the pun-name, the woman declares, 'I will devote my life to it.' Votey aftercomic: an off-panel voice asks 'Could we make it less stupider?' above a crude doodle of a blobby whale-like creature.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.