we
Original: we on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Child: Mom, what happens when we die?
Panel 2:
Mother: "We" die? We're not all going to die at the same time. Why would you assume that?
Panel 3:
Mother: That would imply a plan, like someone was going to melt all the locks shut then set the house on fire.
Panel 4:
Child: But who would do that?! Not me! That blow torch I got was for creme brulee.
Panel 5:
Child: I meant, like, if you die do you go to heaven?
Panel 6:
Mother: Okay?! And the fire extinguishers are gone because they're in for repair, okay?!
Panel 7:
Child: (silent, looking concerned)
Panel 8:
Mother: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Panel 9:
Mother: Right this second that seems pretty unlikely.
Votey:
Mother (in a speech bubble): I'd better sacrifice some more goats.
Child: Mom, what happens when we die?
Panel 2:
Mother: "We" die? We're not all going to die at the same time. Why would you assume that?
Panel 3:
Mother: That would imply a plan, like someone was going to melt all the locks shut then set the house on fire.
Panel 4:
Child: But who would do that?! Not me! That blow torch I got was for creme brulee.
Panel 5:
Child: I meant, like, if you die do you go to heaven?
Panel 6:
Mother: Okay?! And the fire extinguishers are gone because they're in for repair, okay?!
Panel 7:
Child: (silent, looking concerned)
Panel 8:
Mother: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Panel 9:
Mother: Right this second that seems pretty unlikely.
Votey:
Mother (in a speech bubble): I'd better sacrifice some more goats.
Alt text
A nine-panel comic. A young child in a red shirt asks their mother, "Mom, what happens when we die?" The mother, who has glasses and reddish hair, reacts defensively: "'We' die? We're not all going to die at the same time. Why would you assume that?" She continues, increasingly paranoid, "That would imply a plan, like someone was going to melt all the locks shut then set the house on fire." The child, alarmed, protests, "But who would do that?! Not me! That blow torch I got was for creme brulee." Then the child clarifies their original question: "I meant, like, if you die do you go to heaven?" The mother, still spiraling and not listening, keeps justifying herself: "Okay?! And the fire extinguishers are gone because they're in for repair, okay?!" Finally she registers what the child actually asked and lets out a long "OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH," then admits, hand to her face, "Right this second that seems pretty unlikely." Votey panel: the mother, looking shifty, says in a speech bubble, "I'd better sacrifice some more goats."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.