god-is-crying
Original: god-is-crying on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A small angelic figure looks up and asks: "GOD, WHY DOES IT RAIN?"
Panel 2:
God (a large blond figure in the clouds): "BECAUSE I'M CRYING."
Panel 3:
The small figure: "WHY ARE YOU CRYING?"
God: "BECAUSE RAIN MAKES ME SAD."
Panel 4:
God, now looking distressed: "BUT IF YOU'RE CRYING BECAUSE IT'S RAINING BECAUSE YOU'RE CRYING BECAUSE RAIN... OH GAWWD DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!"
Panel 5 (caption bar): "SOON..."
Panel 6:
A bearded man (Noah) stands as a glowing radiant light bursts from the sky.
Voice from the light: "NOAH! BUILD AN ARK!"
Votey:
A close-up of God's face, now calm and thoughtful, with a small smile.
God (thought/speech): "Maybe I can cheer him up with a rainbow..."
A small angelic figure looks up and asks: "GOD, WHY DOES IT RAIN?"
Panel 2:
God (a large blond figure in the clouds): "BECAUSE I'M CRYING."
Panel 3:
The small figure: "WHY ARE YOU CRYING?"
God: "BECAUSE RAIN MAKES ME SAD."
Panel 4:
God, now looking distressed: "BUT IF YOU'RE CRYING BECAUSE IT'S RAINING BECAUSE YOU'RE CRYING BECAUSE RAIN... OH GAWWD DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!"
Panel 5 (caption bar): "SOON..."
Panel 6:
A bearded man (Noah) stands as a glowing radiant light bursts from the sky.
Voice from the light: "NOAH! BUILD AN ARK!"
Votey:
A close-up of God's face, now calm and thoughtful, with a small smile.
God (thought/speech): "Maybe I can cheer him up with a rainbow..."
Alt text
A six-panel SMBC comic. In the clouds, a tiny angelic figure asks God, "God, why does it rain?" The large blond God answers, "Because I'm crying." The figure asks why, and God says, "Because rain makes me sad." Then God spirals into a distressed loop, realizing the cause is circular: "But if you're crying because it's raining because you're crying because rain... oh gawwd dammit dammit dammit!" A caption reads "SOON..." In the final panel, a bearded man (Noah) stands as light bursts from the sky and a voice booms, "Noah! Build an ark!" implying God's self-inflicted crying loop has flooded the world. Votey: a close-up of God's calm, slightly smiling face thinking, "Maybe I can cheer him up with a rainbow..." referencing the rainbow God sends Noah after the flood.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.