dear-god-2
Original: dear-god-2 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (praying): Dear Lord, why do bad things happen to good people?
God (yellow bubble): Hey, I got a question for you.
Panel 2:
God: How do you know I'm really God? How do you know you're not praying to a demon or something?
Panel 3:
Man: I feel your presence, Lord.
God: If I were a demon, wouldn't I try to make you FEEL like I'm God?
Panel 4:
Man: God wouldn't allow that.
God: Are you sure? What if a demon implanted that thought into you?
Panel 5:
God: See, you get into a sort of regression problem. Anything you think you know ultimately depends on something you can't be certain of.
Panel 6:
God: There may be true things, but you can never be sure of them.
Panel 7:
(The man stands silently, looking troubled.)
Panel 8 (sky/heaven scene):
An angel: That was mean, God.
God (yellow bubble, the floating cracker/communion wafer figure): But see, he TOTALLY forgot about the whole bad-things-good-people issue!
Votey:
A man with a small crown-like cap, looking sideways: That's messed up, dude.
Man (praying): Dear Lord, why do bad things happen to good people?
God (yellow bubble): Hey, I got a question for you.
Panel 2:
God: How do you know I'm really God? How do you know you're not praying to a demon or something?
Panel 3:
Man: I feel your presence, Lord.
God: If I were a demon, wouldn't I try to make you FEEL like I'm God?
Panel 4:
Man: God wouldn't allow that.
God: Are you sure? What if a demon implanted that thought into you?
Panel 5:
God: See, you get into a sort of regression problem. Anything you think you know ultimately depends on something you can't be certain of.
Panel 6:
God: There may be true things, but you can never be sure of them.
Panel 7:
(The man stands silently, looking troubled.)
Panel 8 (sky/heaven scene):
An angel: That was mean, God.
God (yellow bubble, the floating cracker/communion wafer figure): But see, he TOTALLY forgot about the whole bad-things-good-people issue!
Votey:
A man with a small crown-like cap, looking sideways: That's messed up, dude.
Alt text
An eight-panel SMBC comic. A red-haired man kneels in prayer (white speech bubbles) talking to God (yellow speech bubbles). Man: "Dear Lord, why do bad things happen to good people?" God dodges the question: "Hey, I got a question for you. How do you know I'm really God? How do you know you're not praying to a demon or something?" Man: "I feel your presence, Lord." God: "If I were a demon, wouldn't I try to make you FEEL like I'm God?" Man: "God wouldn't allow that." God: "Are you sure? What if a demon implanted that thought into you?" God continues: "See, you get into a sort of regression problem. Anything you think you know ultimately depends on something you can't be certain of. There may be true things, but you can never be sure of them." The man stands silently, looking troubled and unsettled. Final panel shifts to a cloudy heaven where an angel says to a small floating round cracker-like figure (God): "That was mean, God." God replies: "But see, he TOTALLY forgot about the whole bad-things-good-people issue!" The joke: God derails a hard theological question with radical skepticism just to avoid answering it. Votey: a close-up of a man wearing a small crown-cap, glancing sideways, saying "That's messed up, dude."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.