holidays
Original: holidays on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Daughter: Daddy, I love you.
Father: WHOA, WHOA. HOLD UP my emotions, young lady.
Panel 2:
Father: I have temporarily canalized all of my emotions, young lady.
Panel 3:
Father: THAT'S THE WHOLE REASON WE HAVE HOLIDAYS! ON VALENTINE'S, I FEEL ROMANTIC LOVE. ON EASTER, SPIRITUALITY. ON THANKSGIVING, FAMILY TOGETHERNESS. ON CHRISTMAS, NOSTALGIA. ALL OTHER DAYS ARE KEPT EFFICIENTLY DEVOID OF HUMAN FEELING.
Panel 4:
Father: "TODAY IS JULY 24. NOTHING YOU CAN OR WILL COMPEL ME TO AN EMOTIONAL RESPONSE ON JULY 24."
Daughter: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.
Father (caption/sound): DOOH! THERE GOES GUILT.
Votey:
A young person's face with a thought bubble above it reading: "Sucker."
Daughter: Daddy, I love you.
Father: WHOA, WHOA. HOLD UP my emotions, young lady.
Panel 2:
Father: I have temporarily canalized all of my emotions, young lady.
Panel 3:
Father: THAT'S THE WHOLE REASON WE HAVE HOLIDAYS! ON VALENTINE'S, I FEEL ROMANTIC LOVE. ON EASTER, SPIRITUALITY. ON THANKSGIVING, FAMILY TOGETHERNESS. ON CHRISTMAS, NOSTALGIA. ALL OTHER DAYS ARE KEPT EFFICIENTLY DEVOID OF HUMAN FEELING.
Panel 4:
Father: "TODAY IS JULY 24. NOTHING YOU CAN OR WILL COMPEL ME TO AN EMOTIONAL RESPONSE ON JULY 24."
Daughter: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.
Father (caption/sound): DOOH! THERE GOES GUILT.
Votey:
A young person's face with a thought bubble above it reading: "Sucker."
Alt text
A four-panel black-and-white comic. A bald father reacts to his young daughter saying "Daddy, I love you" by recoiling and shouting "WHOA, WHOA. HOLD UP my emotions, young lady," explaining he has "temporarily canalized" all his emotions. He lectures that holidays exist to schedule feelings: romantic love on Valentine's, spirituality on Easter, family togetherness on Thanksgiving, nostalgia on Christmas, and all other days are "efficiently devoid of human feeling." He insists "Today is July 24, nothing you can or will compel me to an emotional response on July 24" but his daughter replies "It's my birthday," and he blurts "DOOH! There goes guilt" as his rigid emotional schedule collapses. Votey: a smirking young person's face with a thought bubble above reading "Sucker," revealing the daughter manipulated him.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.