2014-07-22
Original: 2014-07-22 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Title banner: PARENTING TIP: AVOID WORK VIA DISPROPORTIONATE RESPONSE
Panel (single panel): A young child with curly black hair speaks fearfully to a parent who leans in with an intense, angry expression and a raised clenched fist.
Child: BOBBY CALLED ME A BUTTHEAD!
Parent: I WILL BUY A SLEDGE, FIND HIM ON A PLAYGROUND, AND BEAT HIS KNEES BACKWARD!
Child: NEVERMIND! NEVERMIND! I'LL WORK IT OUT!
Votey:
The same child speaks to a second, unseen-from-this-angle parent figure who has a wide, manic grin.
Child: Dad's being weird.
Parent (grinning): LET'S CUT HIM UP!
Panel (single panel): A young child with curly black hair speaks fearfully to a parent who leans in with an intense, angry expression and a raised clenched fist.
Child: BOBBY CALLED ME A BUTTHEAD!
Parent: I WILL BUY A SLEDGE, FIND HIM ON A PLAYGROUND, AND BEAT HIS KNEES BACKWARD!
Child: NEVERMIND! NEVERMIND! I'LL WORK IT OUT!
Votey:
The same child speaks to a second, unseen-from-this-angle parent figure who has a wide, manic grin.
Child: Dad's being weird.
Parent (grinning): LET'S CUT HIM UP!
Alt text
A single-panel SMBC comic under a yellow banner reading 'PARENTING TIP: AVOID WORK VIA DISPROPORTIONATE RESPONSE.' A worried young child with curly black hair tells a parent, 'Bobby called me a butthead!' The parent leans in with a furious face and raised fist, declaring, 'I will buy a sledge, find him on a playground, and beat his knees backward!' The alarmed child immediately backpedals: 'Nevermind! Nevermind! I'll work it out!' The joke: the parent dodges the work of mediating a kid squabble by threatening violence so extreme the child drops the issue. Votey (small black-and-white aftercomic): the same child turns to a second parent and says 'Dad's being weird,' and that parent, grinning manically, replies 'Let's cut him up!' — revealing both parents are equally unhinged.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.