2013-10-07
Original: 2013-10-07 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Young man (thinking): Hmm... I wonder what parents know about kids. I'd better send myself to the future as a spy.
Panel 2 (caption: 30 YEARS LATER):
Young self: Young self! This is old self. Do you copy?
Panel 3:
Old self (older bearded man): I copy.
Panel 4:
Old self: I've infiltrated parenthood. You know how we believe they can't tell when you're lying?
Panel 5:
Young self: Yeah?
Panel 6:
Old self: They know everything.
Panel 7:
Young self: NOOOOO!
Panel 8:
Old self: Everything is ruined.
Panel 9:
Old self: Keep calm. I have to consult several other iterations of us. All of whom are worse off than xN.
Small inset: Hello teenage me! / Yeah?
Panel 10:
Young self: THEY KNOW.
Panel 11:
Old self (close-up, anguished): NOOOO!
Votey:
The bearded man (speech bubble): WELL I AIN'T STOPPIN'.
Young man (thinking): Hmm... I wonder what parents know about kids. I'd better send myself to the future as a spy.
Panel 2 (caption: 30 YEARS LATER):
Young self: Young self! This is old self. Do you copy?
Panel 3:
Old self (older bearded man): I copy.
Panel 4:
Old self: I've infiltrated parenthood. You know how we believe they can't tell when you're lying?
Panel 5:
Young self: Yeah?
Panel 6:
Old self: They know everything.
Panel 7:
Young self: NOOOOO!
Panel 8:
Old self: Everything is ruined.
Panel 9:
Old self: Keep calm. I have to consult several other iterations of us. All of whom are worse off than xN.
Small inset: Hello teenage me! / Yeah?
Panel 10:
Young self: THEY KNOW.
Panel 11:
Old self (close-up, anguished): NOOOO!
Votey:
The bearded man (speech bubble): WELL I AIN'T STOPPIN'.
Alt text
An eleven-panel SMBC comic. A young man thinks, "Hmm... I wonder what parents know about kids. I'd better send myself to the future as a spy." A caption reads "30 years later." The young self radios: "Young self! This is old self. Do you copy?" His future self, now an older bearded man, replies "I copy," then reports: "I've infiltrated parenthood. You know how we believe they can't tell when you're lying? They know everything." The young man screams "NOOOOO!" The old self says "Everything is ruined," then "Keep calm. I have to consult several other iterations of us. All of whom are worse off than us," with a tiny inset showing him radioing his teenage self. The young man echoes "THEY KNOW," and the old self wails "NOOOO!" in anguished close-up. Votey: the bearded man, looking grim, declares in a speech bubble, "WELL I AIN'T STOPPIN'."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.