2012-05-20
Original: 2012-05-20 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A man (brown hair, blue shirt), hands clasped as if praying, looks upward in a dark room.
Man: GOD, WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE? AND WHY IS THERE SOMETHING AND NOT NOTHING?
Panel 2: God replies in a large yellow speech bubble (purple outline), the man shown in profile silhouette at the lower left.
God: ACTUALLY, THE SECOND QUESTION KIND OF ANSWERS THE FIRST. WE MADE THE UNIVERSE SO IT WOULD EVOLVE ENTITIES LIKE US, BUT IN GREATER NUMBER. WE FIGURED IF WE HAD ENOUGH THINKERS, EVENTUALLY SOMEONE WOULD SOLVE THE "WHY IS THERE SUFFERING" QUESTION AND TELL US THE ANSWER.
Panel 3 (left): The man stares blankly, neutral expression.
Panel 3 (right): Yellow speech bubble from God.
God: SO HOW'S THAT COMING?
Panel 4 (left): The man looks down, troubled.
Panel 4 (right): Yellow speech bubble from God.
God: GOOD? BAD?
Panel 5: The man, now small and isolated against a black background, looks dejected.
God: COME ON, MAN! IT'S HELL UP HERE!
Votey:
A single panel. A different man (drawn in black-and-white sketch style) sits below.
God (off-panel, from above): DAMMIT. ANOTHER GONE CATATONIC. UGH. I'M GONNA GO APPEAR ON TOAST.
Man: GOD, WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE? AND WHY IS THERE SOMETHING AND NOT NOTHING?
Panel 2: God replies in a large yellow speech bubble (purple outline), the man shown in profile silhouette at the lower left.
God: ACTUALLY, THE SECOND QUESTION KIND OF ANSWERS THE FIRST. WE MADE THE UNIVERSE SO IT WOULD EVOLVE ENTITIES LIKE US, BUT IN GREATER NUMBER. WE FIGURED IF WE HAD ENOUGH THINKERS, EVENTUALLY SOMEONE WOULD SOLVE THE "WHY IS THERE SUFFERING" QUESTION AND TELL US THE ANSWER.
Panel 3 (left): The man stares blankly, neutral expression.
Panel 3 (right): Yellow speech bubble from God.
God: SO HOW'S THAT COMING?
Panel 4 (left): The man looks down, troubled.
Panel 4 (right): Yellow speech bubble from God.
God: GOOD? BAD?
Panel 5: The man, now small and isolated against a black background, looks dejected.
God: COME ON, MAN! IT'S HELL UP HERE!
Votey:
A single panel. A different man (drawn in black-and-white sketch style) sits below.
God (off-panel, from above): DAMMIT. ANOTHER GONE CATATONIC. UGH. I'M GONNA GO APPEAR ON TOAST.
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic in dark blue and black tones. Panel 1: a man with brown hair and a blue shirt clasps his hands and looks up, asking, "God, why do bad things happen to good people? And why is there something and not nothing?" Panel 2: God answers in a large yellow speech bubble: "Actually, the second question kind of answers the first. We made the universe so it would evolve entities like us, but in greater number. We figured if we had enough thinkers, eventually someone would solve the 'why is there suffering' question and tell us the answer." Panel 3: the man stares blankly while God asks, "So how's that coming?" Panel 4: the man looks down, troubled, as God asks, "Good? Bad?" Panel 5: the man is small and alone against a black background; God presses, "Come on, man! It's hell up here!" The joke: God created humanity as a crowd-sourced think-tank to solve the problem of suffering, and is impatiently waiting on results. Votey (aftercomic, in black-and-white sketch): God looks down at another despondent man and grumbles, "Dammit. Another gone catatonic. Ugh. I'm gonna go appear on toast."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.