2012-04-23
Original: 2012-04-23 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
President (at a podium): Good evening, my fellow Americans. As many of you know, the presidency has little effect on the economy but gets most of the blame or credit for it.
Panel 2 (narration): Historically, this has led to the president lying to the public, and saying things that embarrass him in front of his staff economist.
Panel 3:
President: To remedy this, I've created a new cabinet position - economic whipping boy.
Panel 4:
President: When a bad economic report comes in, I will publicly flog him as a proxy for our fear and anger toward a system we don't comprehend.
Panel 5:
President: What? They lost a lot of new jobs were created, but the unemployment rate went up? How does that even make sense?
Panel 6:
President: Additionally, he will receive floggings every time the stock market dips, and cravings every tax day.
Panel 7:
President: Thank you, and god bless America.
Whipping boy (aside): Annnd, we're out.
Panel 8:
Whipping boy: How'd it go?
President: Great! Now they nobody thinks you're in charge of the economy, your approval rating is at 5%, and people want to hear about other domestic issues!
Panel 9:
A woman: Mr. President...
President: Mr. President, I think you fell asleep.
Panel 10:
Woman: Anyway, we want to demand congress sign the 'fix our economy now' bill.
President: What's it do?
Woman: I don't see how that's relevant.
Votey:
Caption: LATER...
The president (at a podium): The economy has improved because of whatever our bill did or prevented.
President (at a podium): Good evening, my fellow Americans. As many of you know, the presidency has little effect on the economy but gets most of the blame or credit for it.
Panel 2 (narration): Historically, this has led to the president lying to the public, and saying things that embarrass him in front of his staff economist.
Panel 3:
President: To remedy this, I've created a new cabinet position - economic whipping boy.
Panel 4:
President: When a bad economic report comes in, I will publicly flog him as a proxy for our fear and anger toward a system we don't comprehend.
Panel 5:
President: What? They lost a lot of new jobs were created, but the unemployment rate went up? How does that even make sense?
Panel 6:
President: Additionally, he will receive floggings every time the stock market dips, and cravings every tax day.
Panel 7:
President: Thank you, and god bless America.
Whipping boy (aside): Annnd, we're out.
Panel 8:
Whipping boy: How'd it go?
President: Great! Now they nobody thinks you're in charge of the economy, your approval rating is at 5%, and people want to hear about other domestic issues!
Panel 9:
A woman: Mr. President...
President: Mr. President, I think you fell asleep.
Panel 10:
Woman: Anyway, we want to demand congress sign the 'fix our economy now' bill.
President: What's it do?
Woman: I don't see how that's relevant.
Votey:
Caption: LATER...
The president (at a podium): The economy has improved because of whatever our bill did or prevented.
Alt text
A multi-panel SMBC comic. A bald, balding President stands at a podium with a striped backdrop. He addresses the nation: the presidency has little effect on the economy but gets most of the blame or credit for it. Narration notes this historically led presidents to lie and embarrass themselves in front of their staff economist. To fix this, he announces a new cabinet position: 'economic whipping boy' - a blond young man who will be publicly flogged as a proxy for public fear and anger whenever bad economic reports arrive. The President rants confusedly about jobs being created while unemployment rises. He signs off ('Thank you, and god bless America') and the whipping boy says they're off the air. The whipping boy asks how it went; the President cheerfully reports that now nobody thinks the boy is in charge of the economy, his approval is at 5%, and people want to discuss other issues. A woman approaches as the President appears to have fallen asleep, then demands he sign the 'fix our economy now' bill; when he asks what it does, she replies she doesn't see how that's relevant. Votey: a panel captioned 'LATER...' shows the President at a podium declaring, 'The economy has improved because of whatever our bill did or prevented,' with a triumphant raised fist. The joke skewers how economic policy gets credit or blame regardless of what it actually does.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.