2011-04-12
Original: 2011-04-12 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (caption): Shakespeare's Hamlet is based on an older Danish legend about a prince named Amleth.
(Image: a large book lying on a surface, its cover reading GESTA DANORUM.)
Panel 2 (caption): The stories are extremely similar, the major difference being the ending.
(A checklist with green checkmarks:)
- Main character's uncle kills his father and marries his mother.
- Main character acts weird to avoid suspicion.
- King tries to kill main character by sending him away with two men.
- Main character returns to kill king.
Panel 3 (caption): Hamlet suffers a tragic death on Laertes' poison sword after a long period of indecision and mental anguish.
(A dying man, supported by another man, speaks:)
Hamlet: If thou didst ever hold me in thy heart, absent thee from felicity a while, and in this harsh world... draw thy breath... in pain... to tell my story.
Panel 4 (caption): Amleth nets his enemies in giant wall hangings, lights them on fire, and becomes king.
(A blond man stands before a burning castle, arms raised, laughing:)
Amleth: Burn bitches burn! Nobody expects nets! Nobody! Hahaha hahaha!
Panel 5 (caption): I like to imagine a hybrid where we get the best of both worlds.
(A bearded man in a dark stone setting speaks:)
Man: To be or not to be... that is the... oh wait. Wait a minute. I'll just net these fuckers!
Votey:
Caption text (a quote): "The net's the thing in which I'll roast the carcass of the king."
(Image: a large book lying on a surface, its cover reading GESTA DANORUM.)
Panel 2 (caption): The stories are extremely similar, the major difference being the ending.
(A checklist with green checkmarks:)
- Main character's uncle kills his father and marries his mother.
- Main character acts weird to avoid suspicion.
- King tries to kill main character by sending him away with two men.
- Main character returns to kill king.
Panel 3 (caption): Hamlet suffers a tragic death on Laertes' poison sword after a long period of indecision and mental anguish.
(A dying man, supported by another man, speaks:)
Hamlet: If thou didst ever hold me in thy heart, absent thee from felicity a while, and in this harsh world... draw thy breath... in pain... to tell my story.
Panel 4 (caption): Amleth nets his enemies in giant wall hangings, lights them on fire, and becomes king.
(A blond man stands before a burning castle, arms raised, laughing:)
Amleth: Burn bitches burn! Nobody expects nets! Nobody! Hahaha hahaha!
Panel 5 (caption): I like to imagine a hybrid where we get the best of both worlds.
(A bearded man in a dark stone setting speaks:)
Man: To be or not to be... that is the... oh wait. Wait a minute. I'll just net these fuckers!
Votey:
Caption text (a quote): "The net's the thing in which I'll roast the carcass of the king."
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic about the origins of Hamlet. Panel 1: a caption notes Shakespeare's Hamlet is based on an older Danish legend about a prince named Amleth, shown as a thick book titled GESTA DANORUM. Panel 2: a checklist with all items checked shows how similar the two stories are: the uncle kills the father and marries the mother, the hero acts weird to avoid suspicion, the king sends him away with two men to be killed, and the hero returns to kill the king. Panel 3: captioned as the tragic Hamlet ending, a dying man delivers Hamlet's mournful final speech ('absent thee from felicity a while... to tell my story') while being held by another man. Panel 4: captioned as the Amleth ending, a blond man stands before a flaming castle laughing maniacally, shouting 'Burn bitches burn! Nobody expects nets! Nobody!' Panel 5: a bearded man in a stone room begins 'To be or not to be... that is the...' then stops and says 'oh wait. Wait a minute. I'll just net these fuckers!', imagining a hybrid hero who abandons indecision for Amleth's fiery revenge. Votey: a handwritten caption parodying Hamlet's line, reading 'The net's the thing in which I'll roast the carcass of the king.'
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.