2010-12-29
Original: 2010-12-29 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1: A dark-haired man (later named Steve), shirtless, looks troubled. He thinks/says: "There can't be free will. If every moment is just the ultimate product of an earlier state, human choice makes no sense."
Panel 2: The same man, now smiling, against a yellow background: "But wait. Say you had a computer that knew all the conditions of a man's environment, and predicted he'd eat an apple. Couldn't he read the prediction, then CHOOSE to eat an orange?"
Panel 3: The man, frowning, against a dark blue background: "Agh! No! The computer is part of the observed system too! It'd have to simulate every atom of the system itself to predict the future, which would require it to be bigger than ITSELF!"
Panel 4: Smiling again, yellow background: "Wait, wait! If you have a quantum computer, each quantum bit can symbolize three states, so maybe it could simulate a system bigger than itself!"
Panel 5: Frowning, dark background: "Unless the apparatus to make predictions via symbols required the computer to be larger than the system in question."
Panel 6: The man, distressed, grimacing: "Oh GOD! Free will is a LIE! It's all just a result of the initial parameters of--" A second voice (a woman, off to the side) interrupts: "OH, STEVE!"
Votey:
Title box: "THE FOLLOWING NIGHT"
Panel 1: A red-haired woman lies in bed beside Steve (his shirtless torso visible). She says happily: "What gives you such amazing stamina?!"
Panel 2: Steve, looking exhausted and unhappy, replies flatly: "The boundary conditions of the universe."
Panel 2: The same man, now smiling, against a yellow background: "But wait. Say you had a computer that knew all the conditions of a man's environment, and predicted he'd eat an apple. Couldn't he read the prediction, then CHOOSE to eat an orange?"
Panel 3: The man, frowning, against a dark blue background: "Agh! No! The computer is part of the observed system too! It'd have to simulate every atom of the system itself to predict the future, which would require it to be bigger than ITSELF!"
Panel 4: Smiling again, yellow background: "Wait, wait! If you have a quantum computer, each quantum bit can symbolize three states, so maybe it could simulate a system bigger than itself!"
Panel 5: Frowning, dark background: "Unless the apparatus to make predictions via symbols required the computer to be larger than the system in question."
Panel 6: The man, distressed, grimacing: "Oh GOD! Free will is a LIE! It's all just a result of the initial parameters of--" A second voice (a woman, off to the side) interrupts: "OH, STEVE!"
Votey:
Title box: "THE FOLLOWING NIGHT"
Panel 1: A red-haired woman lies in bed beside Steve (his shirtless torso visible). She says happily: "What gives you such amazing stamina?!"
Panel 2: Steve, looking exhausted and unhappy, replies flatly: "The boundary conditions of the universe."
Alt text
A tall single-column SMBC comic. A shirtless dark-haired man, lying in bed and shown across six panels with backgrounds alternating between dark blue (when he's troubled) and bright yellow (when he's excited), argues with himself about determinism. He reasons that there can't be free will if every moment is the product of an earlier state, then proposes a computer that predicts a man will eat an apple so the man could read the prediction and choose an orange instead, then objects that the computer is part of the system and would have to be bigger than itself, then suggests a quantum computer could escape this, then rejects that too. Finally, anguished, he cries that free will is a lie and it's all the result of the initial parameters of-- when a woman interrupts off-panel: "Oh, Steve!" The joke: he's having this obsessive philosophical monologue mid-sex. Votey (labeled "The following night"): a red-haired woman in bed beside Steve asks cheerfully, "What gives you such amazing stamina?!" An exhausted, miserable-looking Steve answers, "The boundary conditions of the universe."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.