2009-02-03
Original: 2009-02-03 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
A balding teacher stands in front of a chalkboard labeled "7th Grade Chemistry."
Teacher: KIDS, I WANT TO APOLOGIZE FOR UPSETTING JIMMY NORTON BY ASKING THE CLASS TO IDENTIFY WHO HAD THE HIGHEST LIPID COUNT BY VOLUME.
Panel 2:
The teacher gestures toward the chalkboard, which now shows molecular diagrams labeled H₂ and CO₂.
Teacher: TO MAKE IT UP TO EVERYONE, TODAY WE'RE PLAYING A GAME TO ILLUSTRATE MOMENTUM CHANGE IN PARTICLE COLLISIONS!
Panel 3:
The teacher stands holding a notepad. Two students face him: a smiling girl in a pink shirt and a sullen red-haired boy in a green shirt.
Teacher: LET'S SEE... SALLY, YOU CAN BE N₂, AND JIMMY CAN BE C₅₅H₇₂O₆N₄Mg!
Votey:
A muscular, naked red-haired figure stands with their back to the viewer, flexing one arm, next to a stand holding a tub of "MARGARINE."
Caption: ADMIT IT. YOU WISH EVERY VOTEY WERE OF ME.
A balding teacher stands in front of a chalkboard labeled "7th Grade Chemistry."
Teacher: KIDS, I WANT TO APOLOGIZE FOR UPSETTING JIMMY NORTON BY ASKING THE CLASS TO IDENTIFY WHO HAD THE HIGHEST LIPID COUNT BY VOLUME.
Panel 2:
The teacher gestures toward the chalkboard, which now shows molecular diagrams labeled H₂ and CO₂.
Teacher: TO MAKE IT UP TO EVERYONE, TODAY WE'RE PLAYING A GAME TO ILLUSTRATE MOMENTUM CHANGE IN PARTICLE COLLISIONS!
Panel 3:
The teacher stands holding a notepad. Two students face him: a smiling girl in a pink shirt and a sullen red-haired boy in a green shirt.
Teacher: LET'S SEE... SALLY, YOU CAN BE N₂, AND JIMMY CAN BE C₅₅H₇₂O₆N₄Mg!
Votey:
A muscular, naked red-haired figure stands with their back to the viewer, flexing one arm, next to a stand holding a tub of "MARGARINE."
Caption: ADMIT IT. YOU WISH EVERY VOTEY WERE OF ME.
Alt text
A three-panel comic set in a 7th grade chemistry class. Panel 1: a balding teacher stands at a chalkboard reading "7th Grade Chemistry" and says, "Kids, I want to apologize for upsetting Jimmy Norton by asking the class to identify who had the highest lipid count by volume." Panel 2: the teacher gestures at molecule diagrams labeled H₂ and CO₂ and says, "To make it up to everyone, today we're playing a game to illustrate momentum change in particle collisions!" Panel 3: facing a cheerful girl in pink and a glum red-haired boy in green, the teacher says, "Let's see... Sally, you can be N₂, and Jimmy can be C₅₅H₇₂O₆N₄Mg!" — chlorophyll's chemical formula, a huge molecule, making Jimmy the heaviest "particle" and reviving the fat-shaming. Votey aftercomic: a muscular naked red-haired figure seen from behind flexes an arm beside a tub of "Margarine" on a stand, with the caption "Admit it. You wish every votey were of me."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.