uncertainty
Original: uncertainty on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman with blonde hair: How can you be certain you've lived a good life?
Woman with dark hair: It's literally impossible.
Panel 2:
Woman with dark hair: A good life is obviously a life made of lots of goodness.
Panel 3:
Woman with dark hair: In order to get the sum of all your goodness, you have to integrate goodness over your lifespan.
Panel 4:
Woman with dark hair: Because the future is unpredictable, you can't use an equation. There is no simple or precise answer.
Panel 5:
Woman with dark hair: So the only way to know your life's good is to be gelf-aware [self-aware] enough about your goodness at smaller and smaller particular moments.
Panel 6:
Woman with dark hair: The problem is that measuring goodness ALTERS THE AMOUNT OF GOODNESS at a given moment!
Panel 7 (figures sledding/sliding down a snowy slope):
Woman with dark hair: So yeah, maybe you can measure the goodness of a man's piece of cake, like a year of having a month of a year without messing it up. But moments remain unknowable.
Panel 8 (figures continuing down the slope):
Woman with dark hair: Humans therefore exist in a perpetual state of hedonic uncertainty! This is a fundamental aspect of the universe that can't be altered!
Panel 9 (figures crashed/tumbled at the bottom of the slope):
Woman with dark hair: So if you're some kind of freak who derives joy directly from the act of measurement, then you'd be unhappy and certain all the time.
Woman with blonde hair: Maybe this is why engineers never read philosophy.
Votey:
Caption text in a hand-drawn black frame: YOU CAN KNOW DISPOSITION OR YOU CAN KNOW MOMENT, BUT NOT BOTH.
Woman with blonde hair: How can you be certain you've lived a good life?
Woman with dark hair: It's literally impossible.
Panel 2:
Woman with dark hair: A good life is obviously a life made of lots of goodness.
Panel 3:
Woman with dark hair: In order to get the sum of all your goodness, you have to integrate goodness over your lifespan.
Panel 4:
Woman with dark hair: Because the future is unpredictable, you can't use an equation. There is no simple or precise answer.
Panel 5:
Woman with dark hair: So the only way to know your life's good is to be gelf-aware [self-aware] enough about your goodness at smaller and smaller particular moments.
Panel 6:
Woman with dark hair: The problem is that measuring goodness ALTERS THE AMOUNT OF GOODNESS at a given moment!
Panel 7 (figures sledding/sliding down a snowy slope):
Woman with dark hair: So yeah, maybe you can measure the goodness of a man's piece of cake, like a year of having a month of a year without messing it up. But moments remain unknowable.
Panel 8 (figures continuing down the slope):
Woman with dark hair: Humans therefore exist in a perpetual state of hedonic uncertainty! This is a fundamental aspect of the universe that can't be altered!
Panel 9 (figures crashed/tumbled at the bottom of the slope):
Woman with dark hair: So if you're some kind of freak who derives joy directly from the act of measurement, then you'd be unhappy and certain all the time.
Woman with blonde hair: Maybe this is why engineers never read philosophy.
Votey:
Caption text in a hand-drawn black frame: YOU CAN KNOW DISPOSITION OR YOU CAN KNOW MOMENT, BUT NOT BOTH.
Alt text
A nine-panel comic. Two women talk: one with blonde hair, one with dark hair who does most of the talking. The blonde asks how you can be certain you've lived a good life, and the dark-haired woman says it's impossible. She explains that a good life is a life made of lots of goodness, so to total it up you'd have to integrate goodness over your lifespan. But the future is unpredictable, so there's no equation; the only way to know is to be self-aware about your goodness at smaller and smaller moments. The problem: measuring goodness alters the amount of goodness at that moment (an uncertainty-principle parody). As she keeps talking, the two figures are shown sledding down a snowy slope, then tumbling and crashing at the bottom. She concludes humans exist in perpetual 'hedonic uncertainty,' a fundamental aspect of the universe; only a freak who derives joy from the act of measurement would be both happy and certain. The blonde replies that maybe this is why engineers never read philosophy. Votey: a caption in a hand-drawn black frame reads 'YOU CAN KNOW DISPOSITION OR YOU CAN KNOW MOMENT, BUT NOT BOTH,' echoing the Heisenberg uncertainty principle.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.