free-will-4
Original: free-will-4 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Woman: Dear God, do we have free will?
God (off-panel, in a speech bubble from above): Yeah, buttloads of it.
Panel 2:
God: You're actually the only creatures in the universe with free will.
Woman: Really?
Panel 3:
God: Yeah, that's why you had to be so isolated. The whole rest of the universe is moving away from you so fast that you'll never reach another star. You also don't have access to the substance that allows you to communicate with all the other civilizations.
Panel 4:
God: The funny thing is you've got free will, but it's in a tiny bubble of the universe that'll never affect anything else. You can decide what kind of sandwich to eat, but not how the other 99999999999999% of the universe evolves.
Panel 5:
Woman: So humans have free will, but humanity doesn't matter.
God (in a glowing speech bubble): Oh, that's good. That's going in the next Bible.
Votey:
Woman: So is there justice in this universe?
God: Juh-what?
Woman: Dear God, do we have free will?
God (off-panel, in a speech bubble from above): Yeah, buttloads of it.
Panel 2:
God: You're actually the only creatures in the universe with free will.
Woman: Really?
Panel 3:
God: Yeah, that's why you had to be so isolated. The whole rest of the universe is moving away from you so fast that you'll never reach another star. You also don't have access to the substance that allows you to communicate with all the other civilizations.
Panel 4:
God: The funny thing is you've got free will, but it's in a tiny bubble of the universe that'll never affect anything else. You can decide what kind of sandwich to eat, but not how the other 99999999999999% of the universe evolves.
Panel 5:
Woman: So humans have free will, but humanity doesn't matter.
God (in a glowing speech bubble): Oh, that's good. That's going in the next Bible.
Votey:
Woman: So is there justice in this universe?
God: Juh-what?
Alt text
A five-panel SMBC comic. A brown-haired woman speaks to God, whose voice comes from off-panel speech bubbles above. Panel 1: The woman asks, "Dear God, do we have free will?" God replies, "Yeah, buttloads of it." Panel 2: God says, "You're actually the only creatures in the universe with free will." The woman, surprised, asks, "Really?" Panel 3: God explains, "Yeah, that's why you had to be so isolated. The whole rest of the universe is moving away from you so fast that you'll never reach another star. You also don't have access to the substance that allows you to communicate with all the other civilizations." Panel 4: God continues, "The funny thing is you've got free will, but it's in a tiny bubble of the universe that'll never affect anything else. You can decide what kind of sandwich to eat, but not how the other 99999999999999% of the universe evolves." Panel 5: The woman, looking uneasy and sweating, summarizes, "So humans have free will, but humanity doesn't matter." God replies cheerfully from a glowing bubble, "Oh, that's good. That's going in the next Bible." Votey (aftercomic): The woman asks, "So is there justice in this universe?" God, drawn as a profile silhouette, responds, "Juh-what?"
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.