poetry
Original: poetry on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1:
Man (holding a book): Sweetie, I got you this book of Shakespeare's love sonnets.
Woman: Awww!
Panel 2:
Man: Now, a lot of these... like, a lot a lot of Shakespeare's are trying to convince an attractive male friend to have children, so that the children will be attractive.
Panel 3:
Man: Dammit, Sally, there's an unspoken rule that you don't read love poetry gifts. You just see the gesture and presume it's good.
Man: This goes in elaborate metaphor at length to convince a dude to have kids.
Woman (named Sally): Put down the book, Sally.
Votey:
A close-up of an angry-faced person.
Text: Don't make me burn it
Man (holding a book): Sweetie, I got you this book of Shakespeare's love sonnets.
Woman: Awww!
Panel 2:
Man: Now, a lot of these... like, a lot a lot of Shakespeare's are trying to convince an attractive male friend to have children, so that the children will be attractive.
Panel 3:
Man: Dammit, Sally, there's an unspoken rule that you don't read love poetry gifts. You just see the gesture and presume it's good.
Man: This goes in elaborate metaphor at length to convince a dude to have kids.
Woman (named Sally): Put down the book, Sally.
Votey:
A close-up of an angry-faced person.
Text: Don't make me burn it
Alt text
A four-panel comic. Panel 1: A man hands a woman a book, saying "Sweetie, I got you this book of Shakespeare's love sonnets." She replies happily, "Awww!" Panel 2: The man explains that a lot of Shakespeare's sonnets are actually trying to convince an attractive male friend to have children so the children will be attractive too. Panel 3: The man, now flustered, says "Dammit, Sally, there's an unspoken rule that you don't read love poetry gifts. You just see the gesture and presume it's good." He notes the book goes into elaborate metaphor at length to convince a dude to have kids. The woman, Sally, deadpans "Put down the book, Sally." The joke: he gave a romantic-seeming gift but can't stop over-explaining how unromantic the actual content is, until he's instructing himself to stop. The votey aftercomic shows an extreme close-up of an angry, glaring face with the caption "Don't make me burn it."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.