2013-09-12
Original: 2013-09-12 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
Panel 1 (narration over a bearded professor gesturing): Imagine there are men chained inside a cave.
Panel 2 (narration over chained figures facing a fire): They see the fading shadows cast by figures before a bright fire.
Panel 3 (narration over a figure walking toward a glow): Only a few are able to free themselves from the world of shadows and go to the light.
Panel 4 (narration over robed figures and a machine): But then, the people of the light created machines, machines that could break the chains and make the way out.
Panel 5 (narration): It's amazing - the way out, they cast their own light, and it turned out the machine light was anyway more entertaining than the fire thing.
Panel 6 (narration over a handheld game console labeled "ZELDA"): So much more entertaining, the people outside the cave decided to go back inside to play with the machines.
Panel 7 (narration over figures around a fire in the cave): So everyone went to live in the cave and had the best time ever.
Panel 8 (two students at a screen, one speaking to the other): Yo, the reason the entire philosophy class was you playing video games is the intersection of platonism and hedonism.
Other student: And tenure, yes.
Votey: A bearded man, eyes downcast: "I've never hated beards so much in my life."
Panel 2 (narration over chained figures facing a fire): They see the fading shadows cast by figures before a bright fire.
Panel 3 (narration over a figure walking toward a glow): Only a few are able to free themselves from the world of shadows and go to the light.
Panel 4 (narration over robed figures and a machine): But then, the people of the light created machines, machines that could break the chains and make the way out.
Panel 5 (narration): It's amazing - the way out, they cast their own light, and it turned out the machine light was anyway more entertaining than the fire thing.
Panel 6 (narration over a handheld game console labeled "ZELDA"): So much more entertaining, the people outside the cave decided to go back inside to play with the machines.
Panel 7 (narration over figures around a fire in the cave): So everyone went to live in the cave and had the best time ever.
Panel 8 (two students at a screen, one speaking to the other): Yo, the reason the entire philosophy class was you playing video games is the intersection of platonism and hedonism.
Other student: And tenure, yes.
Votey: A bearded man, eyes downcast: "I've never hated beards so much in my life."
Alt text
A tall comic retelling Plato's Allegory of the Cave as a story about video games. Top panels: a bearded professor narrates how men are chained inside a cave, watching shadows cast by figures before a bright fire, and how only a few free themselves and go toward the light. Then the people of the light create machines that can break the chains and lead the way out - but the machine light (shown as a handheld console labeled "ZELDA") turns out to be more entertaining than the fire, so everyone goes back into the cave to play with the machines and has the best time ever. The final panel shows two students slouched at a glowing screen; one says the reason the entire philosophy class was just him playing video games is the intersection of platonism and hedonism, and the other replies, "And tenure, yes." Votey: a close-up of a bearded man looking down, saying, "I've never hated beards so much in my life."
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.