2011-05-31
Original: 2011-05-31 on Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Transcript
A single-panel scatter plot graph.
Y-axis label (vertical): "Amount of bodily fluids shared"
X-axis label (horizontal): "Amount of sex"
Plotted points (each a red dot with a label):
- High on the Y-axis, low X (near the axis): "Shower drain"
- Below that: "High school date"
- Below that: "Doctors"
- Lower on the Y-axis, low X: "Fast food employees"
- Near the bottom, low X: "Guy with poor sense of personal space"
- Middle of the chart (mid X, mid Y): "Sock"
- Far right, very high Y: "Life partner"
- Far right, mid Y: "Temporary life partners"
- Far right, at the bottom (low Y, high X): "Imaginary Princess Leia"
Votey:
An empty bordered panel. In the top-right corner is a small drawing of a single dot labeled "hand" (a hand, drawn as just a point). In the bottom-left corner is a tiny coordinate axis symbol (an L-shaped pair of arrows), implying this is the far-out, near-zero-sex / minimal-shared-fluids extreme of the same graph.
Y-axis label (vertical): "Amount of bodily fluids shared"
X-axis label (horizontal): "Amount of sex"
Plotted points (each a red dot with a label):
- High on the Y-axis, low X (near the axis): "Shower drain"
- Below that: "High school date"
- Below that: "Doctors"
- Lower on the Y-axis, low X: "Fast food employees"
- Near the bottom, low X: "Guy with poor sense of personal space"
- Middle of the chart (mid X, mid Y): "Sock"
- Far right, very high Y: "Life partner"
- Far right, mid Y: "Temporary life partners"
- Far right, at the bottom (low Y, high X): "Imaginary Princess Leia"
Votey:
An empty bordered panel. In the top-right corner is a small drawing of a single dot labeled "hand" (a hand, drawn as just a point). In the bottom-left corner is a tiny coordinate axis symbol (an L-shaped pair of arrows), implying this is the far-out, near-zero-sex / minimal-shared-fluids extreme of the same graph.
Alt text
A hand-drawn single-panel scatter plot. The vertical axis is labeled "Amount of bodily fluids shared" and the horizontal axis is labeled "Amount of sex." Red dots plot various people and things by how much sex versus how many bodily fluids you share with them. Clustered near the vertical axis (lots of fluids, almost no sex) are, from top to bottom: "Shower drain," "High school date," "Doctors," "Fast food employees," and "Guy with poor sense of personal space." In the middle sits "Sock." On the far right: "Life partner" is at the very top (most fluids and most sex), "Temporary life partners" is in the middle, and "Imaginary Princess Leia" sits at the bottom-right (lots of sex, essentially no shared fluids). The votey is a nearly empty panel zoomed way out to the graph's far origin corner, with a tiny dot labeled "hand" in the upper right and a small coordinate-axis symbol in the lower left, the punchline being that masturbating by hand is the extreme low-fluid-sharing point.
Transcribed by Claude Opus 4.8.